a good consolation

i just realised that
for quite some time i've always been the guy who
knows-all-the-secrets-but-has-to-pretend-that-he-doesn't-know-any.

my friend actually asked me
"how you survive ah? won't your head explode?"
haha. maybe.

well, i'm just glad to know that people are more comfortable with me.
goodnight.

the last lap

don't you find it difficult sometimes
to care for others unconditionally,
and not expecting anything in return?

this issue has been on my mind for the past few days
but i guess as time goes by
i'm getting better at it =)

prelim results are so far, so good i guess.

i just can't wait for steamboat party tmr!

the feeling of dry-ness

is it you,
is it you
maybe you're the one i've been waiting for
could you be the one for me?
could you be the one i need?

do my best,
let GOD do the rest :)
remember ben,
it's never about you,
it's all about HIM.

get up, buckle up and we'll move on

keep going ben,
keep doing your best.
in due time, by GOD's grace
everything will fall into place :)

i love church and my church friends;
very very very much.
they're people i'll always have.

someday we'll know why i wasn't meant for you

there'll always be friends you enjoy being with,
irregardless of age, background or personality :)

i sure had a tiring day,
teaching someone can be fun and tiring too.
now, it's time for a good sleep :)

and yes, HE's coming again.

self conflicted

yup, i guess
caring for someone unconditionally is indeed
an unrealistic, difficult thing to do.
and i'm not the only person who thinks so, heh.

that aside,
it's funny how we've one mind
but two different entities in it.
one desires to do what's right,
the other desires to do whatever it wants.
one desires to be selfless, caring and sensible,
the other, selfish, nonchalant and reckless.
for me,
i guess i struggle between
caring for others unconditionally
and wanting something in return; to be appreciated, to be reciprocated.
but i guess i ought to be selfless,
even if it means that whatever i do may go in vain.

btw, prelims are over
i'm taking a good break.
and i mean good.

take me away

as lame as it sounds,
but whenever i'm feeling blue, sad, confused or lost in thoughts
playing computer games actually helps.
all of a sudden, i dont need to bother anymore.

i love WoW, period.